I have the honor of leading the Men’s evening Bible study at my local church, serve on the men’s leadership team, and write a monthly column for the men’s ministry in our church’s newsletter. Over the past two years of being involved in men’s ministry, I have thought long and hard about what makes a good men’s ministry and how to disciple men. This experience has caused me to examine my own life and marriage, along with my understanding of biblical manhood.
Men need challenging, convicting, and equipping material to help them understand how to be a man. When most women ask me, “What is wrong with my husband?” and then specify something their husband needs to work on, my reply to them is they don’t understand and need you to spell out in detail what you want from them. This is why I’m thankful for the new book The Dude’s Guide to Marriage: Ten Skills Every Husband Must Develop to Love His Wife Well by Darrin and Amie Patrick because it spells out how men can love their wives well by the grace of God. This book explores how to listen and talk to your wife, how to fight well, grow in grace with your wife, provide, rest, serve, submit, pursue, and worship. The book also has four appendixes that look at singleness, the need for counseling in marriage, what if my wife is more spiritual than me, along with exploring what the love languages are.
Each chapter is short but thought-provoking. At the end of each chapter are discussion questions designed to foster conversation between a man and his wife. Having asked my wife these questions, I can assure you it will open your eyes to think about issues in your own life, you may not be aware of, or even about areas in your life you know you need to work on but currently aren’t doing anything about. The sections where Darrin’s wife Amie writes will help men to see a woman’s perspectives on the issues Darrin addresses in this book. Chapter nine on pursuing your wife helped me to understand how my wife wants me to continue to pursue her emotionally and mentally so we can grow closer to the Lord and one another.
I highly recommend both of Darrin’s books on manhood. His first book The Dude’s Guide to Manhood will help men understand what biblical manhood is all about. The Dude’s Guide to Marriage will help men to learn how to love, care, listen, and do life with their wife. Reading this book and asking the questions at the end of each chapter were challenging, uncomfortable at times, convicting, helpful, and equipping all at the same time for me. I encourage you if you’re a man who loves Christ, the Church, and your wife to go pick up this book. Reading this book will help you to become the man God wants you to be, the husband you need to be, and the Christian God expects you to be.
I received this book for free from Thomas Nelson for this review. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
Dave Jenkins is happily married to his wife, Sarah. He is a writer, editor, and speaker living in beautiful Southern Oregon. Dave is a lover of Christ, His people, the Church, and sound theology. He serves as the Executive Director of Servants of Grace Ministries, the Executive Editor of Theology for Life Magazine, the Host and Producer of Equipping You in Grace Podcast, and is a contributor to and producer of Contending for the Word. He is the author of The Word Explored: The Problem of Biblical Illiteracy and What To Do About It (House to House, 2021), The Word Matters: Defending Biblical Authority Against the Spirit of the Age (G3 Press, 2022), and Contentment: The Journey of a Lifetime (Theology for Life, 2024). You can find him on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Youtube, or read his newsletter. Dave loves to spend time with his wife, going to movies, eating at a nice restaurant, or going out for a round of golf with a good friend. He is also a voracious reader, in particular of Reformed theology, and the Puritans. You will often find him when he’s not busy with ministry reading a pile of the latest books from a wide variety of Christian publishers. Dave received his M.A.R. and M.Div through Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary.