Dear Young Mother,
You may feel invisible during this season of life. You aren’t. We serve El Roi, the God who sees us (Genesis 16:13). You are seen. You are known. Your selfless love and service, though imperfect, matter for the Kingdom. You, dear momma, are changing the world as you raise up the next generation.
Your life did not begin when you began raising children, nor will it end when they become adults. Your life is for God’s glory. And for this season, you get to glorify Him by caring for His children.
Over the span of six years, the Lord gave me four sons. When they were all littles and I forgot something, people would laugh it off and assure me I was suffering from “mom brain”. Well, I’m seventeen years in, and I’m hoping the excuse of “mom brain” still applies!
The truth is, moms easily forget things. In the chaos of caring for our families, our minds are never truly focused on any one thing completely. We are a distracted bunch. Mothers are notorious multi-taskers, which sounds impressive, in theory, but practically means that something always gets missed. Ladies, we don’t want to miss the truth. I’d like to remind you of a few truths of your role as mother. Let’s step out of the day-to-day view and span our vision a bit wider to see the bigger picture.
Remember whose daughter you are. You, dear sister, are a beloved daughter of the King. You are loved and delighted in (Psalm 149:4). You are pursued and watched over (Psalm 121:5). You never need to surrender to feelings of insignificance. You never need to feel alone. Your heavenly Father is always with you (Matthew 28:20). He is for you (Psalm 56:9). You never need to feel left out. You belong. Your identity was settled on the cross. You are His and everything else about you flows from this truth (Psalm 43:1).
Remember you are an image bearer. We look like our Father (Genesis 1:27). We inherit His qualities. Reflect your Father’s image to your children. Don’t just tell them about God. Show them. Show them grace. Show them forgiveness. Show them compassion. Show them mercy. Show them the steadfast love of the Father.
Remember: eyes up, momma! Look to God. Keep your eyes on Him. We focus on the eternal, not the temporal (Colossians 3:2). When we look at Him, we are radiant (Psalm 34:5). Don’t get distracted by all the world’s trinkets. They are not your treasure, He is. Gaze at His beauty. Find satisfaction in Him alone. Contentment doesn’t exist in Netflix, romance novels, relationships, likes, or shares.
Remember you are entrusted with stewardship, not ownership. Steward your children. Care for them while you can. Love them fiercely knowing that they don’t belong to you, they belong to Him. They exist for His purposes, not yours. Love them by preparing them for when you send them out into the world.
Remember whose approval you already have. You don’t need the approval of other moms. Conversely, they don’t need yours either. We need each other to help us look more like Christ, not each other. We are not the standard. He is. We are not the competition. Lift up your sisters. Champion them. Show them grace, not judgment. Help one another.
Remember your children are like arrows in your hand. Prepare them to be sent out into the world. Train them. Teach them to obey you so they learn how to obey God. Prepare them to be disciple makers. Prepare them for spiritual warfare. Prepare them to use their voices for the voiceless. You want to change the world? Send out gospel-equipped arrows (Psalm 127:4). Aim well.
Remember you are welcome at the throne. You’re not perfect. You will make mistakes. You will fail your children often. Seek repentance. Run to the throne with confidence. There you will find mercy and grace (Ephesians 4:16). Daughter, you are never outside the scope of your Father’s mercy. Richard Sibbes said, “There is more mercy in Christ than sin in us.”
Remember your home is a mission field. Make disciples in your home. Your job is not to make star athletes and academically superior children. Your job is to teach your kids to follow Christ (Luke 14:27). Your job is to pray for God to turn their hearts towards Him. Godly mothers create a curiosity for Christ inside their families. Fuel their capacity for wonder with the gospel. You want your child to want to imitate Christ, not a Disney princess or an Avengers superhero. Make Christ the main attraction in your family.
Remember the world that exists outside your home. Motherhood is exhausting and isolating. Be intentional in sharing your life beyond your walls. You are the light of the world (Matthew 5:14). Show your children how to love their neighbors across the street and around the world.
Remember your rich, biblical lineage. Remember Hannah, Esther, Ruth, Mary, Priscilla, Deborah, Elisabeth, Lois, Eunice, and many others. Consider the influence each of these women had on the people in their sphere of influence. They taught God’s Word, they led, they served, they obeyed, they risked, they sacrificed, and they followed. You are part of this lineage. Contribute to it.
Remember God defines success, not us. It’s easy to look at the Instagram feeds of our friends and feel like we’re not excelling in motherhood. Our idea of success is not necessarily God’s, but it’s His standard that matters. He sees what we cannot. He values what we do not. When my son shows the fruit of repentance, I celebrate. I’m witnessing the divine work of him being conformed to the image of Christ (Romans 8:29). Character development isn’t always attractive under an Instagram filter, but it is what pleases and glorifies God.
Dear young mother, the old saying is true, the days are long, but the years are short. Twenty years ago, I took my husband’s hand before our friends and family and said, “I do.” I blinked, and my first son was born. I blinked again, and he was walking. Blink. More sons. Blink. I’m teaching them to read and write. Blink. Baptism. Blink. My home has been hijacked by a group of their friends and I’m running back to the store for more food! Blink. I’m at the DMV with my oldest getting his driver’s permit. Blink. We’re looking at colleges.
In the moment, the days seem to drag on. I remember what it was like to try to make it to 7:30 bedtimes so I could have one minute to myself. But trust me when I tell you that one day, you’ll go to bed and they will stay up later than you. One day you’ll give anything for them to want to spend every second of their day with you. One day you’ll offer your help, but they won’t need it anymore.
And one day, you’ll stand before your heavenly Father and hear the words, “Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master” (Matthew 25:23).
Until That Day,
A Fellow Momma